Week 39: 9th Inning

Wait, was that a contraction? I can’t tell you how many times I’ve Googled “what does a labor contraction feel like?” The answer is a little murky and, like most things in pregnancy, it depends on the woman. But generally it’s lower abdominal cramping, maybe with some back pain and tightening of the uterus.

I’ve been having a lot of cramping, pulsing, pressure, and other belly movements, so until it becomes more frequent and obvious, I’m going to chalk this up to the “warm-up” phase. Like in any endurance event, the warm-up is critical. You have to get those muscles fired up and ready for the big day!

See Ya, Cold Symptoms

Today is officially the first day since I started maternity leave 24 days ago where I feel like I can go outside for as long as I want, and do whatever I want to do! For the first 13 days of leave the air quality was poor from the wildfires which kept me inside a lot, the last 6 days I’ve been resting at home with a nasty cold, and in-between we were back-to-back with fun Thanksgiving weekend festivities. So, I’ll definitely appreciate having this week to go outside for walks, get some sunshine in the park, and meet up with friends. Or ya know, have a baby!

Thanksgiving morning walk

Getting a cold wasn’t fun but it really forced me to just DO NOTHING. I’m terrible at doing nothing because I always feel guilty for not checking things off my to-do list, or doing something more productive/active/social. But at 39 weeks pregnant and sick, I finally allowed myself to binge-watch Netflix shows, stay in my PJs all day, view random YouTube tutorials, and watch cheesy Christmas movies.

It was nice to have the down time, but I’m sad that we had to miss so many fun parties and events this week including my niece’s Nutcracker performance, GGTC party, girls dinner at my fave restaurant, Jamaroo event, EA holiday party, etc. Who knows, maybe this downtime is exactly what I needed right now?


So, Any Baby News?

Childbirth is unique for many reasons, but I think it’s fascinating that this life-changing event is about to happen, and we have no idea when exactly it’s going to happen. With all the technological advancements in medicine, doctors still can’t predict when a baby will naturally come. I think this is biology’s way of prepping us for parenthood, right?! As a parent, you have to relinquish some control and expectations, otherwise you set yourself up for a lot of anxiety and disappointment.

I was talking about this lack of control with my parents last night, and they said that you just have to trust that you, as parents, have structured values and rules so that the kids will be safe and make good decisions.

So, as I patiently wait here for Baby B’s arrival, I’m reminding myself to let go of any expectations or desires for his due date. He’ll be here when he’s ready to be here. And rest assured that we’ll be letting everyone know when he makes his debut :-). In the meantime, here is the answer to the question, “have you had that baby yet?”:



Mark and I got monogrammed Christmas stockings for our fireplace and mine says Mom, his says Dad and we have one for Baby B. Mom. I can easily and naturally identify myself as a wife, daughter, sister, niece, aunt… but Mom!? Every time I look at the stocking I realize how new and slightly uncomfortable it is to take on this whole new identity. Am I going to be a new person? Do I need to change my wardrobe and my hair? MOM JEANS!? Oh god. Mama friends, how long did it take you to grasp your new identity and get used to “Mom”?


I’m largely joking, by the way. I’m unbelievably excited to be a mom to Baby B and I know I’ll mostly be the same person next month as I am today, even with the new title.

We actually talked about this concept of identity in my Mama Circle group a few weeks ago. We went around and shared the identities we’d be giving up as a result of becoming moms, and the identities we’d be gaining. It helped me wrap my head around the fact that my titles may change over time, and I may want to temporarily give up certain things like teaching spin classes and full Ironman triathlons, but I’m still me. My true self and my values aren’t changing, just the outside layers that come and go throughout life.

Other Tidbits:

  • Tomorrow is my parent’s 42nd wedding anniversary! They’re giddy to meet their 4th grandkid.
  • Steph taught my how to make apple pie and it was absolutely amazing. She is a baking rockstar!
  • I’ve been learning chess which is something I’ve always wanted to do! It’s a hard game and I’d love other people to play with and some tips/tricks.
  • We’ve been making large batches of soup and chili and freezing them. Thanks to all the mamas who suggested doing that!
  • Volta by Cirque du Soleil was amazing and so inspiring. It’s showing in SF until early February so check it out!
  • I’m doing a few of the ‘natural’ induction tricks like getting acupuncture, drinking raspberry leaf tea, eating more pineapple, eating spicy food, walking (starting today). I don’t think these are very scientific, but they’re all safe and healthy so why not try!?
Happy 42nd anniversary to my mom and dad

That’s all for now. Hope you all have a fantastic week, and I’ll keep you posted on Baby news!




3 thoughts on “Week 39: 9th Inning

  1. I love all the soul-searching during this special & PRECIOUS time in yours & Mark’s lives. Your true self will only be enhanced. I won’t lie, you’ll be tested on all levels, but I promise it’s a love like no other! It’s almost indescribable. Your relationship will also change w/ Mark, as you watch your beautiful child grow & learn… taking bits & pieces of each of you. You’ll learn how to balance everything that goes into raising a little human being. It won’t always be 50/50, but since your marriage is give & take… so will parenthood. It may seem overwhelming at times, but the GOOD always outweighs the BAD! Your love for your child will always get you both through the challenging times. You & Mark will be stronger, as you figure out things together. Babies obviously don’t come w/ a manual, so learning together is priceless. We all did it. My best advice is to keep communicating w/ each other, laugh together as you go along, & no matter what… TRY to reserve time for each other! (Even if it’s just a little bit.) I love that you’re documenting your journey. Time goes quickly, so remembering details is important. Phil & I are so excited for this new chapter in your lives. Use your gut instinct & trust in each other. Baby B is already SO loved. You guys are going to be wonderful parents! And in closing of this “novella,” you’ll know when you have a true contraction! Embrace it, know that it’ll pass, & it’ll ALL be worth it! We love you guys!
    Aunt Leslie & Uncle Phil~

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